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Showing posts from October, 2019

Life After Loss

updated 10/17/2019
When we chose the name Samuel, we chose it based on a bible verse. 1 Samuel 1:27-28 "I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him." We never read onto the second part of the verse, until after he passed.  "So now I give him to the Lord. For his whole life he will be given over to the Lord.” Little did we know, we were going to be giving him to the Lord, forever. We couldn't have picked a better name.
I should be 37 weeks pregnant.
37 weeks is when I went into labor with our daughter.
I should be round, rolling out of bed, and on baby watch.
Instead, I’m 6 weeks postpartum, with no baby in my arms.
There is no doubt in my mind these last weeks have been the hardest of my life. Recovering from a c-section, and grieving the loss of our baby boy is not how I planned on spending my maternity leave. The first week was spent crying, and not fully comprehending all that had just happened. I would fall asleep wrapping his blanket around me …